Double Teamed: Semen studies

Columns January 11, 2012

We recently read an article online that claimed that semen is healthy for you if swallowed.
So, for this issue’s installment of Double Teamed, let’s talk swallowing semen!

Dylan: I feel like a dude who just wants to get head from his girlfriend wrote this entire thing.

Clorisa: Right. And I question what a man would get out of it – does it really affect the experience if their girlfriend swallows or not?

D: It’s hot. But aside from getting some kind of personal enjoyment, I can’t really think of a genuinely positive reason to do it, and I totally don’t blame anyone for not wanting to swallow because I wouldn’t. But the fact that a study says that it can help with pregnancy issues and… what was the other thing? Preeclampsia?

C: Cell regeneration.

D: Yeah, it gives your body more minerals and proteins and things. Cumming inside somebody would make them…

C: …stronger as a person. That’s the argument right there: superpowers. And you’ll be able to fly!

D: Swallowing sperm, the fact that it could be healthy… I could see it from a biological/evolutionary perspective. It’s not going to be poison – that wouldn’t make sense – so the fact that it could heal or be good for you is kind of neat. I wouldn’t trust a study unless it was made by equally represented sexualities and gender – gay and straight men and women doing the whole thing to correlate the data – not just some dudes who want their girlfriends to swallow their cum.

C: But to have a full, vast representation, that’s going to take a huge amount of time and, ultimately, does that really matter? I don’t think you’re going to see a study being done and then everyone thinking, “Well, I’m gonna start drinking semen by the gallon then! That’s so good for me – better than milk!” It’s never gonna happen. Maybe it’s good for you, obviously it’s not poison because it’s okay for you, but that’s just one of those small miracles of life. Really, in the long run, it’s not going to give you superpowers, but it won’t destroy you either.

D: It seems ridiculous. But I’m all for oral sex, because it’s fun. I’ve always enjoyed it.

C: It’s pretty good stuff.