Friday, March 22
The Odds, The Archers
Upstairs Cabaret, $20, 10 pm
I think my favourite skit from Kids in the Hall was the one where Satan trades an endless supply of weed for a jean jacket. The guy ends up with dread-like dope growing from his head. Damn, those guys were some kinda funny. It wasn’t always funny “ha ha” but it was definitely funny “weird” almost all the time. And Canadian. Right up there with SCTV, in my books. It’s no surprise that my dad never wanted me to watch either of them and yet I still stayed up late with the sound turned way down, stifling laughter in the hopes that he wouldn’t come in to check on me.
Friday, March 22
White Poppy, Morning Coup, Highway
Copper Owl (above Paul’s Motor Inn), $8, 9 pm
I don’t know much about the history of coffee. Like, who were the first people to figure out that you could get a little rush from crushing a bean and soaking it in water? There are a lot of things I wonder about along the same lines. Mostly to do with food and how it became known that it could be eaten in a certain way, or even at all. When did people start to combine certain herbs and spices to create new flavours? And who tested these new combinations? Was an iron stomach a necessity back in the early days of cooking?
Saturday, March 23
Anciients, Black Wizard, The Shrine, Dirty Fences
Logan’s, $10, 9 pm
I decided to do a stop-motion music video for one of my last projects in my video class. I’ve never attempted stop-motion before but I thought, “How hard could it be?” Take a few photos, lay them all together to the music, and, voila, finished product. Well, a few photos is going to end up being more like about 1,200 or so. And that’s the choppy version. If I want to do this right I might need to triple that. Well, it should be a blast. A painful, time consuming, aggravatingly frustrating blast. Whose idea was this again?
Tuesday, March 26
Zerbin
Lucky Bar, $14, 8 pm
Have you seen Jeff Gordon prank a used-car salesman for Pepsi? No? Do you have any idea what I’m talking about? Google that stuff. I tell ya, that guy can drive. I remember trying to take a Honda Civic for a test drive when I was in high school. It was a stick shift and had been left in gear before I hopped in. Started it up, popped the clutch, and promptly scratched the bumper on the four-wheeler parked in front of it. Needless to say, I took that little gem on an hour-long test drive. I figured since I was going to have to buy a new bumper I might as well have a good time. Come to think of it, I think my dad worked that one out. Thanks, dad.
Friday, March 29
The Stanfields
Club 90NE9, $16.50, 7 pm
Boxers or briefs? My son doesn’t seem to care much at the moment. He’s just getting used to the idea of wearing underwear in the first place. Some days he prefers to go commando and I don’t bother arguing because, really, I’m just happy he’s learned to poop and pee in a toilet. There’s the odd accident here and there, usually when he’s really tired and into whatever he’s doing, but other than slapping a diaper on for sleeping in, he’s got it figured out. He loves to pee outside. Once he gets a bit older there may be trouble; for now we just water the plants.
Friday, March 29
Matt Costa, Carly Ritter
Sugar Nightclub, $20, 9 pm
I keep trying to cut down on my sugar intake. Over the years I’ve quit various things: smoking, alcohol, pot, sex. Some of these by choice, some because others made the decision for me. But sugar is proving that it’s ready for a fight. I like sugar in my coffee. I’ve tried putting less in my cup, which is fine, but I can’t go without. I like dessert. Give me some pie or a brownie once in a while and I’m in heaven. I used to love drinking soda or pop or whatever you want to call a carbonated beverage these days, but those are reserved for a treat at the movies. So what if I sneak a candy bar here and there? Everything in moderation, right? Tell that to the waist size on my pants.
Saturday, March 30
Isobel Trigger, Man Made Lake, Dust & Bones
Lucky bar, $10, 8 pm
Remember the day that both Use Your Illusion albums came out? Unless you’re old and your own bones are covered in dust, you probably don’t. But I do. Got them on my lunch break, on cassette. Well, my mom did, then I went home and listened to them. Life was never the same after that day.