{"id":17572,"date":"2019-04-03T09:00:10","date_gmt":"2019-04-03T16:00:10","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.nexusnewspaper.com\/?p=17572"},"modified":"2019-04-01T12:14:31","modified_gmt":"2019-04-01T19:14:31","slug":"lets-talk-shell-have-a-sleeve","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.nexusnewspaper.com\/newsite\/2019\/04\/03\/lets-talk-shell-have-a-sleeve\/","title":{"rendered":"Let’s Talk<\/em>: She’ll have a sleeve"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Allow me to set the scene: my boyfriend and I are out for dinner with my family at a low-key sit-down place that has us seated in the kid-friendly corner thanks to my teeny-tiny nephew. As we\u2019re finishing up our meals, a man and a woman walk in with four young kids (three boys and a girl) and are seated in the booth next to us. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

The man and the three boys (all wearing clothing with hockey logos of some kind on them) pile into one side of the booth, and the woman and the girl sit on the other side.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n

A few minutes later, the waiter walks over to them and asks for their drink orders. The man orders for himself and the kids and then says, \u201cAnd she\u2019ll have a beer,\u201d motioning to the woman. (This catches my attention mostly because it\u2019s a pet peeve of mine when a man orders for a woman; I know this was once considered chivalrous, but now it, honestly, feels condescending.) <\/p>\n\n\n\n

The waiter turns to the woman and starts listing off the types of beer they have. The man then interjects and tells him what kind she would like. (Okay, see this right here is why I find this condescending.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/a>
Let’s Talk?<\/em> is a column exploring women’s rights issues; it’s in every issue of Nexus<\/em>.<\/figcaption><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

The waiter then asks the woman what size she would like, to which the man replies, \u201cShe\u2019ll have a sleeve.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Now, at this point, my boyfriend\u2019s hand squeezes my own, because he knows I\u2019m freaking cringing on the inside. I shake my head and mutter, \u201cI just cannot.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

For the next week, every time I\u2019m asked to make a decision in my boyfriend\u2019s presence, he interjects with, \u201cShe\u2019ll have a sleeve.\u201d And every time I have to explain my threat of death to the poor unsuspecting person who has asked me a question. And, as much as it\u2019s now become a bit of an inside joke between us, it still irritates the shit out of me, because somewhere there is a group of little boys who are learning that it\u2019s not only acceptable but encouraged to answer on behalf of a woman, and there\u2019s a little girl who\u2019s being shown that men\u2019s voices hold more authority than her own. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I know a man ordering for a woman seems like such a little thing, but children learn from our examples, and we need to set good ones\u2014no matter how small\u2014if we want them to grow up in an equal world, where all voices matter.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Allow me to set the scene: my boyfriend and I are out for dinner with my family at a low-key sit-down place that has us seated in the kid-friendly corner thanks to my teeny-tiny nephew. As we\u2019re finishing up our meals, a man and a woman walk in with four young kids (three boys and […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":15677,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[5,230],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-17572","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-columns","category-april-3-2019"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nexusnewspaper.com\/newsite\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17572","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nexusnewspaper.com\/newsite\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nexusnewspaper.com\/newsite\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nexusnewspaper.com\/newsite\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nexusnewspaper.com\/newsite\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=17572"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.nexusnewspaper.com\/newsite\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17572\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":17573,"href":"https:\/\/www.nexusnewspaper.com\/newsite\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17572\/revisions\/17573"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nexusnewspaper.com\/newsite\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/15677"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.nexusnewspaper.com\/newsite\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=17572"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nexusnewspaper.com\/newsite\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=17572"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.nexusnewspaper.com\/newsite\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=17572"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}