{"id":24449,"date":"2023-10-18T09:00:42","date_gmt":"2023-10-18T16:00:42","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.nexusnewspaper.com\/?p=24449"},"modified":"2023-10-31T12:23:44","modified_gmt":"2023-10-31T19:23:44","slug":"expend4bles-nothing-short-of-an-atrocity","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.nexusnewspaper.com\/newsite\/2023\/10\/18\/expend4bles-nothing-short-of-an-atrocity\/","title":{"rendered":"<em>Nic&#8217;s Flicks<\/em>: <em>Expend4bles<\/em> nothing short of an atrocity"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><i>Expend4bles<br \/>\n<\/i>0\/4<\/p>\n<p>Now, I wouldn\u2019t say that <i>The Expendables<\/i> is my favourite action franchise by any stretch of the imagination, but I did have fun with the first three movies. So it was with cautious optimism that I recently walked into a movie theatre to see <i>Expend4bles<\/i>. And I\u2019ll tell you what: I was going to be nice, but this movie has gone too far. Within the first 20 minutes, it almost became the first movie I\u2019ve ever walked out on. I was so offended by how this movie was put together that steam was coming out of my ears.<\/p>\n<figure id=\"attachment_20923\" aria-describedby=\"caption-attachment-20923\" style=\"width: 225px\" class=\"wp-caption alignleft\"><a href=\"https:\/\/www.nexusnewspaper.com\/newsite\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/04\/image0-e1618507388664.jpeg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-medium wp-image-20923\" src=\"https:\/\/www.nexusnewspaper.com\/newsite\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/04\/image0-e1618507388664-225x300.jpeg\" alt=\"\" width=\"225\" height=\"300\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.nexusnewspaper.com\/newsite\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/04\/image0-e1618507388664-225x300.jpeg 225w, https:\/\/www.nexusnewspaper.com\/newsite\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/04\/image0-e1618507388664.jpeg 525w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 225px) 100vw, 225px\" \/><\/a><figcaption id=\"caption-attachment-20923\" class=\"wp-caption-text\"><em>Nic&#8217;s Flicks<\/em> is a column about movies (photo by Nicolas Ihmels\/<em>Nexus<\/em>).<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p>This entire film, from the plot to the dialogue, looks and sounds horrible. A great example of this is when Lee Christmas (played by Jason Statham) is at a party after being fired from The Expendables for incompetence. He\u2019s there protecting an internet influencer\u2014this scene is every stereotype in the book. From the jerk of a boss to the violent action hero, they\u2019re all there and it\u2019s just horribly offensive.<\/p>\n<p>But that\u2019s all secondary to the two things I really hate about this movie.<\/p>\n<p>The first thing is that everything looks, sounds, and acts fake. The guns look like they are made out of Play-Doh; the vehicles\u2014whether it\u2019s a truck, car, or plane\u2014look even worse. Then there\u2019s the middle-school drama class of an acting show. Everything the actors do is completely phoned in. Most of them look like they are sleepwalking through their lines like movie zombies. \u201cGive me money. This movie sucks and I\u2019m only here for the money, so give it to me so I can tell my kids and grandkids I\u2019m a real actor!\u201d That\u2019s the acting level of this movie.<\/p>\n<p>The second thing I hated about the movie is its sad excuse for special effects. These are not special effects. They are a burnt movie marinara pizza that they melted cheese on and then, in defiance of man and movie gods everywhere, put underdeveloped, green-screen sauce on top of and put on display like some sort of Christmas ornament from movie hell. And who uses fire that looks like it\u2019s made out of Lego to make an explosion? I\u2019m not kidding; I saw more realistic effects in <i>The Lego Movie<\/i> than I did in <i>Expend4bles<\/i>.<\/p>\n<p>The best thing about my whole <i>Expend4bles<\/i> experience is the quiet, empty theatre I got to sit in, and not because I like to enjoy my movies without people on their phones all the time, but because it gave me hope for humanity, because they refused to pay money to see this atrocity.<\/p>\n<p>Unfortunately, the same can\u2019t be said for me.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Expend4bles 0\/4 Now, I wouldn\u2019t say that The Expendables is my favourite action franchise by any stretch of the imagination, but I did have fun with the first three movies. So it was with cautious optimism that I recently walked into a movie theatre to see Expend4bles. And I\u2019ll tell you what: I was going [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":20923,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[5,297],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-24449","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-columns","category-october-18-2023"],"aioseo_notices":[],"aioseo_head":"\n\t\t<!-- All in One SEO 4.9.8 - aioseo.com -->\n\t<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Expend4bles 0\/4 Now, I wouldn\u2019t say that The Expendables is my favourite action franchise by any stretch of the imagination, but I did have fun with the first three movies. So it was with cautious optimism that I recently walked into a movie theatre to see Expend4bles. 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