![\"\"](\"https:\/\/www.nexusnewspaper.com\/newsite\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/01\/nelly-nexus.jpg\" "\\"nelly")
<\/a>Nelly Furtado was so awkward on stage. She seemed at times lost, disappearing inexplicably mid-song to change her wardrobe or, more accurately, put on a mismatched coat or vest. Her stage banter was so stilted it felt like she was a robotic servant of pop-music doom come to take us away to her leader (that being the grim reaper, who made two appearances: once so Furtado could read from a bucket list thrown together by dum-dum crowd members, and a second time to hold a gigantic singalong cue card that simply read “la la la la la.” Both of these things happened<\/em>.).<\/p>\n Breathe, Jason, breathe.<\/p>\n Furtado’s DJ’s name is DJ Sean. Or maybe it’s DJ Shawn. I can neither disprove or confirm the spelling. But that’s a pretty sweet DJ name.<\/p>\n Alright. Inhale. Deeply. One more go at this…<\/p>\n Furtado’s hit songs sounded pretty decent, actually. Okay, not “Parking Lot,” my personal favourite Furtado jam, and the biggest reason I was in attendance. That one sounded putrid. But the other hits, like “I’m Like a Bird,” “Turn Off the Light,” and “Try” sounded sort of fine. She really does have a good voice when she’s not singing through one nostril. The rest of this show’s tunes though… let’s talk about the cover songs… a jam of Steve Miller Band’s “Fly Like an Eagle” (immediately following “I’m Like a Bird”) disintegrated after 45 seconds when Furtado vanished side stage to remove an item of clothing. Ahhhhhhh… psyche. Her encore cover of Madonna’s “Like a Prayer” was both vapid and inappropriate, considering most of the super sparse audience consisted of middle-aged soccer moms and prepubescent girls.<\/p>\n Last chance. One more deep breath.<\/p>\n Nelly Furtado’s stage moves consisted of a bounty of gypsy hand gestures, some Axl Rose swaying, and a few power squats. She should really work on her choreography.<\/p>\n Okay, let’s end this.<\/p>\n I know she’s a hometown hero and all. I know she’s got a pretty good set of pipes and all. I know she’s written some decent songs over the years and all. But, really, Nelly Furtado was one of the worst concerts I’ve been to. And I really just want to forgot all about it.<\/p>\n Immediately.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Okay. Deep breath. Canadian songbird Nelly Furtado’s performance at the Save-on-Foods Memorial Centre on January 8 was special. Very special. The kind of special that makes you want to kill yourself. Now-deceased tyrannical Lybian leader Moammar Gadhafi\u00a0got a full dose of Nelly when she and other pop stars like Usher and Mariah Carey played a […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":5515,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[4,9],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5514","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-arts","category-webexclusive"],"aioseo_notices":[],"aioseo_head":"\n\t\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t\n\t\t