Sour Grapes: Conquer the hangover

Columns January 9, 2013

It’s January. A time to decompress from December stresses, look toward the new year with a hopeful gaze, and recover from the inevitable holiday hangover. It’s that magical time of year when a month’s worth of overeating, sugar binging, and booze culminates in a cloudy-brained crash landingÉ just in time for a new semester!

Sure, that New Year’s Day nausea seems light years away now, but you just know you’ll soon be suckered into “back-to-school” drinks with classmates, followed by “let’s-catch-up” beers with those friends who went home for the holidays. Before you know it, it’ll be St. Patrick’s Day and that New Year’s resolution you made to drink less will be nothing but a fading echo in your foggy memory.

Luckily, there’s no shortage of supposed hangover cures to relieve the morning-after blues. According to the likes of the Huffington Post, Time, and Men’s Health magazines, here are some of the most popular options:

The greasy breakfast

This most hallowed of hangover traditions isn’t just about stuffing yourself until you’re ready for naptime, it’s actually about replenishing your B vitamins. And you know what’s chock-full of B vitamins? Meat. And eggs. Covered in cheese. Thank goodness for Victoria’s seemingly endless string of breakfast joints serving up all kinds of combinations of this tasty trifecta. Try Shine CafŽ’s brie- and bacon-smothered Benny next time you need a B-vitamin boost.

Coconut water is the new Gatorade.

Hair of the dog

A little breakfast cocktail can go a long way to relieve hangover symptoms. Mostly, the alcohol just numbs your pounding headache, but along with that comes the added benefit of replenishing more of those elusive vitamins. A Bloody Mary will not only give you a little kick of vodka, but will also give you a decent dose of vitamin C with all that tomato juice. Same goes for the orange juice and champagne classic, the Mimosa. Blue Fox CafŽ mixes it up with a mango peach variety that’s sure to cure (if only temporarily) your hangover headache.

Coconut water

This tropical beverage has recently risen to fame as the new re-hydration powerhouse. Coconut water is giving sports drinks a run for their money, flaunting its five essential electrolytes over Gatorade’s pathetic two. It’s also full of potassium, providing a refreshing alternative to choking down an over-ripe banana first thing in the morning. And with no added sugar, coconut water has earned the right to sit alongside the iced teas and spirulina smoothies in the health-drink aisle of almost every local grocery store. But, beware: if you prefer a beverage that doesn’t require chewing, steer clear of the “with pulp” variety.