We have all known—or will come to know—at least one fuckboy over the course of our lives: the guy who makes our skin crawl whenever we have to interact with him; the one who has one too many dating apps, yet is eternally single; the one who wears just a little too much cologne, hair product, and/or jewelry. His sneakers and/or teeth are uncomfortably white, he always lets social media know when he’s going to the gym, and he’s a little too into his car.
He’s the one who rotates through “baes” on a weekly basis, ending them all because “she’s crazy.” He has become a trope in the world of millennials, the avocado toast of the dating pool, if you will—you know it’s not worth it, but it’s convenient, so you do it anyway.
The fuckboy is a rite of passage among women in their 20s. At best, we come away with a wariness toward relationships; at worst, a round of antibiotics.
Now, I know I may be oversimplifying things and stereotyping here. I’m probably coming across as a crazy, bitter man-hater who needs to take a good long look in the mirror myself before casting such irrational judgments on these poor guys, right? Because they are more than the sum of their dating profile pictures and Peter Pan complexes. Right?
Maybe they are. Maybe they are getting painted with a stereotypical, hypocritical brush. Maybe they are tiny onions of insecure layers, just waiting for the right woman to come along and teach them how to love. Maybe, and most likely, they are a product of their environment. They come from a land of low expectations, where women have been deemed irrational and emotional. They see the world through the lens that society has placed in front of them. And, fair enough.
But here’s the thing, fuckboys: at the end of the day, this doesn’t give you a pass on your behaviour. We get it—you’re damaged, you’re insecure, but so are we. And it is not our job to fix you.
Reminder: being a fuckboy actually has nothing to do with what you wear or your grooming standards. It’s in how you interact with the world around you. It’s in the double standards, and it’s in the blinders you place on the women you fuck.