Valentine’s Day has finally passed, and the leftover chocolate is going on clearance in stores nationwide. Pretty much every Shoppers Drug Mart, Walmart, and Dollarama is getting rid of their sugary treats, offering a lower price for the past-holiday items. Now, I love discount chocolate, don’t get me wrong, but Valentine’s Day has always kind of bugged me. I didn’t mind it growing up, but as I’ve gotten older I’ve come to the realization that everyone slowly comes to: the holiday is a bit of a scam.
The origins of Valentine’s Day are complicated, and not anything near what you traditionally think of when someone mentions the holiday, but it’s become a day to recognize that special person in your life who makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside. I think this is probably my main problem with Valentine’s Day—how it’s celebrated and how it should be celebrated are two different things.
For a holiday that’s supposed to represent our love (and not just romantic love) toward all kinds of people close to us, it’s centred on spousal relationships exclusively. This leaves people without these connections feeling left out of what should be a universal holiday. You’ve probably heard people calling February 14 “Forever Alone Day” or “Sad Singles Day.” This is a perfect example of the divide that can be created by this holiday. Spending the day without a romantic partner can make you feel lonely, especially when you’re bombarded by social media posts and advertisements featuring happy couples having a good time.
What I’d like to know is why the day that celebrates love doesn’t seem to include every kind of love. The love you feel for your friends differs from the kind of love you feel toward your family, and the love you feel for your family differs from the love you feel toward yourself. Ancient Greek philosophy actually breaks the English word “love” into many different categories that take these differences into account. There’s, among others, philia, which refers to the affection seen between friends; éros, which refers to a sexual or intimate love; storge, which includes the love between parents and children; and philautia, meaning love directed toward yourself.
The way I see it, Valentine’s Day should be celebrated with everyone you love, no matter what kind of love that may be. Have a good friend who you love chatting with? Why not make them a card telling them how important they are to you? Or what about your mom/dad/guardian? Why not grab them a treat? Something that I like to do every year is take my friends on a “friendship date.” It’s nothing too fancy—maybe dinner at a local restaurant, or a fun night bowling—but I make sure that the people close to me know how much I value them.
At the end of the day, Valentine’s Day is a day to celebrate love, and that love doesn’t have to mean romance. If you’ve never done anything for friends or family, give it a shot. Maybe next year you can make your own cards, go on a friendship date, or just spend some time with the people you care about. Perhaps in the future celebrating our connections will be more of a central theme for this holiday, but for now, you can make sure to get the message out there: Valentine’s Day isn’t just for couples. It’s a day for friends, family, and everyone else we care about.