Let’s Talk 2.0: Let’s talk about dating

Columns July 6, 2022

Isn’t it nice when you meet someone new? It’s exciting but also terrifying, because there are all these dating rules, right? And then dating seems a whole lot more difficult if you live in a multicultural country where everyone brings their own rules around what is acceptable and what crosses a line.

Society is changing, and we’re right in the middle of it, putting our hands from one hot plate to another when all we want is stability in life.

Let’s Talk 2.0 is a column exploring feminist issues (graphic by Celina Lessard/Nexus).

So, let’s talk about rules. It’s never ending, isn’t it? What all genders must realize is that there are few rules left. She can ask him out if she is genuinely interested in him; she can pay for dinner because she is independent enough to show off that she earns her own living and doesn’t need a man to buy her food.

But an invitation is a form of appreciation, and you can’t put a price on human interaction. It should be genuine and, most importantly, nothing should be expected in return. A drink is not yes, as a campaign raising awareness about sexual violence tells us, and this is entirely true. Netflix and chill is also not yes. It’s a movie and getting to know each other.

In this fast-paced environment we’re all in, it somehow feels like appreciation of each other and getting to know one another is lost. But here’s the thing: females don’t need a partner anymore. We are independent, educated, earn our own money, have our own friends. If we choose to have a partner, it’s not for status; it’s because we want to.

So, having said all that, the most fun part of dating is getting to know the other person. That’s what it’s about. Put the brakes on, people—get to know each other. If you like each other, there will be chemistry in the future the same way there is at the very beginning.

In a time where you can just swipe left and right like you’re shopping, maybe it’s time to slow down and just try to reconnect, with some real human interaction and the beauty of experiencing time together. The one thing we can learn from our parents and grandparents is when they talk about being young, they don’t talk about all their hit-and-miss dates, they talk about the genuine connection they had with their partner. They talk about the adventures they had and the obstacles they had to face when they grew together.

This is ultimately what we all want, and you can create it for yourself, just remember to slow things down.