The Examined Life: Taking control of motivation

Well, I guess we’re attending college from home now. I don’t know about you, but I’ve been struggling to keep my productivity up. None of my classes have scheduled meeting times, which sounds great, except that it puts a lot more responsibility on me to not fall behind. Of course, grades and deadlines help keep […]

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Freedom from Addiction: What goes up will come down

Early on in addiction recovery, remaining sober from a primary addiction—be it alcohol, gambling, pornography, or unhealthy relationships—is a grind. It is painful and difficult and often the effort is abandoned one or more times. I’ve heard it said that relapse is part of recovery, and, therefore, should be expected. This initial withdrawal cannot be […]

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Because I Said So: The in-between

Lately, I’ve been thinking a lot about beginnings, endings, and everything in between. I’ve realized over time that getting from point A to point B is never a smooth, straight line; instead, it’s curvy and jagged, and I can never find that darn ruler when I need it. Twenty years ago, I married the person […]

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The Examined Life: My mind, blind

It’s fascinating that our entire human existence is spent inside our minds. Yes, we use our bodies to interact with the world and other people, but there is a buffer zone between our brains and the world. That buffer zone is what we call “the senses.” Thanks to vision, hearing, smell, taste, and touch, it […]

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Freedom from Addiction: Codependency

Like many sex and love addicts, I also fall under the category of “codependent.” I think this term is fairly common today, but still there is significant misunderstanding and lack of knowledge around codependency. It is not a healthy way of depending on others, like interdependence, where both or all people are whole and complete […]

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Because I Said So: Back to school?

Just when I thought I could relax a little and enjoy the summer with my kids, I find myself being accosted at the stores with back-to-school advertising and supplies. I attempt to shield my eyes from the glare, feel my way to the s’mores-making aisle, and pretend that I didn’t just see the animated pencil […]

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Freedom from Addiction: The power of the label

My mom has told me that she does not like labels. Before I even went to my first Sex and Love Addicts Anonymous (SLAA) meeting, I made an announcement to my mom, step-dad, and brother, who I was living with at the time following a relationship with a violent, abusive, manipulative nightmare of a man. […]

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Because I Said So: Affordable and healthy summer fun

With classes—for ourselves and for our children—at an end, the BC government moving into phase three of its restart plan, and summer upon us, I notice the tension in the air melt away like the sea-salt caramel ice cream cone dripping in my hand. While we now have the freedom to travel within British Columbia, […]

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Freedom from Addiction: The formula for recovery

Every journey through addiction recovery is unique, because everyone’s journey through life is unique. However, I believe that there are some essential ingredients in order for an addict to have success in becoming sober and finding the lost joy, peace, and self-worth that comes from remaining sober. If there is a formula for addiction recovery […]

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The Examined Life: Are you angry?

By now you’ve heard about the Black Lives Matter movement and the associated protests. Maybe you’ve even attended one of these marches yourself. It’s so extremely disheartening that these protests are even necessary. We have made huge strides in the past 100 years, but bigotry still lingers. The movement has seen some success: the amount […]

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